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Bruce Law Firm - December 2021
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Burn, Baby, Burn
OUR CHRISTMAS INFERNO!
A few years ago, our family started an unusual family tradition: The day after Christmas, we set our tree on fire. You might think that’s morbid, crazy, or outrageous. But actually, it’s pretty simple.
While our family is typically home for Christmas Day, we like to take the kids camping during the days between Christmas and the New Year. With school closed, it’s a great time to explore the state, take a trip to Georgia, or just get out of town. One year, we were going to Disney World in our camper, but we had to go back to work immediately after we returned. The idea of coming home to a fully decorated tree to take down and dispose of after the trip filled us with dread, so we decided to do it the day after Christmas. Where we live, we’ve got a lot of room without our neighbors on top of us, so we can more or less do what we want. That’s when it occurred to us: Why drag the tree to the curb to slowly turn brown before being hauled away, when we could burn it instead?
Of course, it was incredibly fun, so now it’s something we do every year. We take off the ornaments, pack them away, and then make a firepit in our yard. Add the tree and some gasoline, and it’s up in flames in seconds. The kids love it, and it makes for quite a spectacle. This year, Ashley’s mom is bringing her tree over to burn alongside ours. If anyone else wants to get the decorations out of their house, they’re welcome to join us. The more, the merrier! Many people want to have holiday traditions with their families, but they don’t necessarily know where to start. Rest assured, yours don’t have to be as elaborate as lighting a Christmas tree on fire. For example, Ashley’s dad is Jewish, so our family also celebrates Hanukkah. Every year, Ashley’s dad comes over with a bunch of
Other holiday traditions your family could adopt include a special meal, a favorite holiday-themed movie you watch every year, or a favorite game to play together. Some families have an annual tradition of volunteering to help others, dressing up in their fanciest outfits, making cookies together, or creating their own decorations. Whatever it is, we hope your family has (or can find) a tradition you can get excited about. This season is for building memories that will last a lifetime — and especially for those with kids, the years fly by faster than we ever expect. We’re wishing you a safe, happy, and meaningful holiday season! –Ashley and Christopher Bruce
small presents, and he hides them around the house so the kids have to hunt and find them. We also light the Menorah and reminisce about the meaning of Hanukkah. Ashley’s stepfather is from Austria, and so every year on Christmas Eve, the Austrian Angels visit the kids and leave them small gifts. These are simple traditions, but that doesn’t make them any less meaningful. We’re always so thankful to have our family around and to share this part of the kids’ culture and heritage with them.
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A Clean Bedroom Is Good for Your Health
Home for the Holidays?
Your Custody Agreement Decides The holiday season is supposed to be a time of family togetherness, but children of divorced parents have their lives split across two homes. Some families gather both households together for one big celebration, but that’s not the norm. So, how do you decide where your child will spend Christmas — and for that matter, every other holiday? It all comes down to the custody agreement. With some days — such as Christmas, Thanksgiving, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day — considered special, most parents are not content to let the standard custody schedule decide with whom the kids will spend them. Generally, those involved outline a specific holiday schedule when custody terms are finalized. The holidays can be divvied up between parents in several ways. The most popular approach involves alternating years so the child celebrates each holiday with each parent every other year. The second most popular arrangement involves splitting days so the child spends the morning with one parent and the afternoon with another. Some agreements also involve assigned holidays, which means the child will celebrate them with the same parent every year. Many agreements use multiple approaches — for example, alternating Christmas each year but permanently granting Father’s Day to the father and Mother’s Day to the mother. Matters can also get complicated. Say, for example, Dad only has the kids on the weekend. If Mom has the kids for a holiday, and the holiday falls on Saturday, Dad has lost valuable visitation time. These types of factors are why it’s so important to work out a detailed holiday schedule, complete with “makeup” time, if necessary. A good attorney will bring potential sources of conflict to your attention and work out an agreement before a holiday is on the horizon. If your child’s other parent isn’t following the custody agreement, or if there has been a significant life event that requires revisiting the holiday schedule, the Bruce Law Firm can help. Our experienced attorneys can provide you with the guidance and representation you need to create or enforce a fair agreement. Call us today to schedule a consultation!
3 Tips to a More Restful Space
When keeping your house clean, you probably focus on the major germ hotspots: kitchens and bathrooms. You may, however, be overlooking the room where you spend the most time — your bedroom. Failure to thoroughly clean the place where you sleep can have negative effects on your health in terms of worsened allergies or asthma. Feel your best by following these three cleaning tips. Banish dust high and low. Your bedroom’s biggest threat to your health probably exists in the form of dust mites. These microscopic organisms live off the dead human skin found in dust, and while they prefer soft surfaces like your bedding, their presence anywhere can cause an allergic reaction. To keep your bedroom as dust-free as possible, start with the blades of your ceiling fan and give the tops a good scrub. Work your way down over furniture and shelving, ending at the baseboards. Don’t forget to clean the vent covers, which are dust magnets. Pay attention to your air quality . Central heating and air systems keep your house temperate but also circulate dust through the air. Make sure to change your filters as recommended by the manufacturer’s instructions. If you use any in-room devices like air purifiers, dehumidifiers, or window air conditioners, you should change the filters monthly. Meanwhile, be mindful of mold — try to keep the room at 50% humidity or lower and clean any mold in and around windows immediately with a bleach/ chlorine solution. (Don’t forget to wear a protective mask!) Clean all your soft surfaces. You probably know to change and wash your sheets once a week, but what about all of the other soft surfaces in your bedroom, like outer bedding and curtains? In addition to the risk of dust mites, soft surfaces trap dirt and oils. Your comforter or bedspread should be washed every 1–2 months. Many people also forget about their pillows; protective pillow covers used under your pillowcase should be washed monthly, while pillows themselves should be washed 2–3 times per year. Lastly, your curtains collect dust, too — wash them 3–4 times annually.
Is your friend or client married to a controlling, manipulative, narcissistic husband?
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With the above tips, your bedroom will be cleaner and more relaxing than ever. Take in the clean air and fresh scents and enjoy a good night’s sleep.
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Should You Stay or Go?
Responding to Infidelity in a Marriage
Anyone who has been cheated on knows it’s one of the most painful things that can happen in a relationship, so it’s no surprise that infidelity is behind 20%–40% of divorces. But after a relationship of many years that may include children, property, or a business, the decision to continue or end a relationship after infidelity is not a simple one. While men are statistically more likely to cheat than women (20% versus 13%), 61% of unfaithful men remain married, compared to 44% of unfaithful women. The reasons for this discrepancy are not entirely understood, but it is clear that many marriages do survive infidelity; cheating does not have to be a death sentence for the marriage. When a spouse has been unfaithful, the wronged partner’s friends and families will likely have a lot to say about it. From “once a cheater, always a cheater” to “stay together for the kids,” well-intentioned but ultimately unhelpful advice will abound. But assuming the unfaithful partner wants to reconcile, only the person who’s been cheated on can decide if they’re better off staying or leaving. Whether a marriage can survive infidelity will depend on a number of factors. Was the cheating a one-time indiscretion, or did an affair take place for years? Did the cheater confess, or were they caught? Do they genuinely regret their actions? The
answers to all these questions will likely play a role in whether or not trust can be rebuilt and the marriage saved.
For any marriage that’s experienced infidelity, couples counseling is the best road forward. Cheating is frequently precipitated by other relationship problems, which an impartial therapist can help couples identify and work through. A therapist can also help couples discuss the harm that infidelity caused and help partners regain trust in the relationship. Finally, even if the wronged spouse does decide to file for divorce, attending therapy in good faith will give them peace of mind that they did all they could to salvage the relationship. In the end, it’s best for some relationships to end. But couples that successfully regain trust and rebuild their marriage have happy outcomes. In fact, they eventually show the same amount of satisfaction with their relationships as those that didn’t experience infidelity. Each relationship is unique, so how each couple deals with infidelity will be, too.
Celtic Yule Cupcakes Inspired by RecipesForAPaganSoul.weebly.com
A family tradition of making cookies!
Want to add a traditional twist to your holiday season? Try these Celtic Yule cupcakes — a modern dessert for an ancient celebration.
Ingredients
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2 eggs
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2/3 cup sugar 1 1/4 cups flour
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1 1/3 cups raisins 2 tbsp hot water
1/2 cup butter
1/2 tsp vanilla extract Orange zest, to taste
3/4 tsp baking powder
2 cups powdered sugar
1 tbsp milk
Directions
1.
Preheat the oven to 375 F.
2. In a large bowl, beat together the eggs, butter, vanilla, orange zest, and sugar. 3. Add the flour and baking powder, then fold in the milk and raisins. 4. Grease a cupcake tin before pouring the batter into it. 5. Bake for 20–25 minutes or until cooked through. Let cool. 6. In a small bowl, blend the hot water and powdered sugar to create the icing. 7. Ice your cupcakes and serve!
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The Bruce Family’s Outrageous Christmas Tradition page 1 3 Tips to Keep Your Bedroom Clean How the Holidays Affect Custody Agreements page 2 Responding to Infidelity in a Marriage Celtic Yule Cupcake page 3
A Festive DIY Table Setting page 4
5 Easy DIY Tips for a Lovely Holiday Table
No. 4: Snowy Salt Shakers
It’s been a crazy year, so if you’re hosting, you might feel tempted to go all out and make your home as beautiful and cozy as possible. But there’s no need to make your decoration receipts any longer —make your holiday table setting even fancier without spending a ton of money.
decorate your ornaments with an elegant white or pearl background, then green and red tinsel and leaves beside your guest’s name or initials. It’ll be a perfect, elegant touch and one they’ll take home to hang on their tree!
Alongside your table salt and pepper, get another clear salt shaker (or a couple) and put a mini plastic, snowy evergreen tree into it, and bam! You have an adorable, festive touch to any holiday table. It’s so simple and creative, it’ll be a surefire conversation starter.
No. 2: Napkins With Mini Bells
You don’t have to be an expert seamstress to buy a packet of small mini bells and attach them to the ends of a colorful cloth napkin! It’ll add a magical, musical touch to any meal.
No. 5: A Mistletoe-Topped Party Favor
Creating small wrapped party favors? Instead of a bow, tie a sprig of mistletoe to the gift! It’s a fun holiday touch and easy to find around the holidays at big box and home improvement stores. You can also visit a local tree farm for cuttings! These ideas are super easy, but we know it might not always feel easy to pull off a beautiful holiday party on a dime. However, it’s definitely worth it and can be a lot of fun! We hope you enjoy giving these ideas a try.
No. 3: Fresh Cranberries for a Unique Centerpiece
If you found fresh cranberries at the farmers market, why not spend a few dollars extra for another bag or two, rather than an $80 flower arrangement? Fresh cranberries have beautiful greenery that can be easily arranged using Mason jars, Epsom salts, and tea lights! Best of all, you can eat or cook with them after the party’s over.
No. 1: Painted Ornaments as Seating Labels
Who needs boring cardstock seating labels when you can make them out of festive decorations? These days, you can find affordable ornaments anywhere. Use some paint to
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