Bruce Law Firm - June 2022

Bruce Law Firm - June 2022

World’s Greatest Dad CELEBRATING CHRISTOPHER THIS FATHER’S DAY

Christopher has now been a father for six years, and I couldn’t ask for a better co-parent. This Father’s Day, I want to take a moment to celebrate the man who is helping raise our two beautiful children with love, patience, and good humor. Like most parents, we’re both busy, so we can’t always spend as much time with the kids as we want. But Christopher makes time where you wouldn’t think there was any. When he knows he will have a particularly full day, he’ll often set an alarm for himself and one of the kids to do something special before the rest of us get up. For Ruby, that’s playing with her ponies and coloring. Meanwhile, Russell loves to play with his train. It’s a special time for him to connect with both kids one-on-one. That can be a hard thing to do once the day gets started and there’s so much going on, and I admire how he’s willing to sacrifice a bit of sleep to build those relationships and make precious memories. He’s also very involved in their daily lives. He loves taking them to school and wishing them good luck. He’s also involved in all the daily tasks it takes to keep a family up and running, like making breakfast, getting the kids dressed, helping them brush their teeth, and so much more. Taking care of kids can be exhausting, so I’m relieved we can split those responsibilities. I have no idea how single parents manage, and I admire them greatly. Christopher also makes it a point to share his passions with the kids. He’s an avid fisherman, and when we visit my mom by the beach, he’ll wake the kids up around 5 a.m. and take them out in the boat. I’m still happily asleep, but the

kids love it. The early hours are the best time to catch snook and ladyfish, and they’ll be out there for hours before the sun rises. Due to the time of day, the kids generally don’t call it fishing; they call it “early bird gets the worm,” and they always look forward to going. Historically, studies of parents have mainly focused on mothers. Researchers have only acknowledged in recent decades that fathers significantly impact their children’s lives. Children with involved fathers generally do better in school, engage in fewer high-risk behaviors, earn more money, have healthier adult relationships, and experience fewer psychological problems. Many of today’s fathers are much more engaged and interact very differently with their kids than those who parented a few decades ago. It’s a positive and ongoing shift in our society that will serve future generations well. Of course, all parents are still learning as we go, and not everyone instinctively knows how to best connect with their kids when they’re small. Since we can all use a little help, we’ve included some tips on page 2 for building that connection and emotional bond when your kids are at their most vulnerable and least verbal. I hope you’ll learn a thing or two — I know I did! I’m so grateful that Ruby and Russell have such a wonderful father to care and guide them as they grow up. I want to thank Christopher and all of the other engaged fathers out there. You truly do deserve a day to celebrate your role.

Reelin’ them in

Leadline at the horse show

Happy Father’s Day,

Do you want to build a snowman?

–Ashley Bruce

561-810-0170 • 1

Breaking the Habit

Child’s Play

How to Better Connect With Young Kids

Unfortunately, kids don’t come with manuals. We all want to be the best parents possible and build a lifelong relationship with our children, but between work, household responsibilities, and taking care of your child’s physical needs, who has the time for anything else? Luckily, it doesn’t take a lot to create a connection with your children when they’re little, and the benefits will last for decades. Here are some expert tips to reinforce your special bond. Play . When kids aren’t eating, sleeping, or learning, they’re playing. It’s not just fun and games — children learn through play, and it helps them make sense of the world around them. Engaging in developmentally appropriate play alongside your children is one of the fastest ways to forge a connection. Playing with dolls and cars may not be super fun for you, but it is for them, and taking an interest in the things they love will mean a lot to them. Play also takes many forms, including arts and crafts, dancing, and make-believe. So, be ready to include the activities you love, too. Touch . Little kids typically explore the world through touch, but they also tend to get less cuddly as time goes on. Take full advantage of those tactile years now and create a physical bond with your child. Simple options include snuggling on the couch, holding hands when in public, tousling hair, or rubbing shoulders. Most kids also love a bit of roughhousing, so don’t be afraid to play-wrestle, give piggyback rides, and engage in tickle fights — as long as everyone knows the rules and respects each other’s boundaries. Talk. Once children learn to talk, many don’t take long to begin chattering their parents’ ears off. It can be simultaneously cute and frustrating, but it’s also an opportunity to get to know your child better. Young kids often love reminiscing, even if they’re only recapping their day. They also have plenty of questions that can be a learning opportunity for both of you. And don’t underestimate the number of opinions your child would love to share, especially if you ask. No matter how you connect with your children, take the time to slow down, put the devices away, and give your undivided attention. A few quality minutes a day will add up to many precious memories.

How to Cut Your Kids’ Screen Time

The science is clear: Too much screen time can lead to kids experiencing developmental delays, poor sleep, and weight gain. And yet, kids love those small glowing devices. To keep your children healthy, you need to find a way to set limits. But how can you create rules around their favorite pastimes without causing a lot of drama? Create realistic rules. You know your family best. Review the American Academy of Pediatrics’ best practices for screen time online, and then consider what’s both healthy and doable. Maybe the ultimate screen time spent will be more than the experts suggest, but an improvement is better than no change. Determine usage limits and establish device-free times. Then create clear expectations and consequences, and don’t back down from enforcing them. Take the devices away. It is not a punishment, though it might feel like one to your kids at first. But it’s actually helping them by removing the temptation. Your elementary school child will be less likely to get sucked into a YouTube hole, and your teen won’t send “just one” text at dinner if the device isn’t right there. Keep these devices out of sight during no-use time, and put them away once your kids have met their daily limits. In the end, it will make things easier. Spend More Time Together. Giving your children your undivided attention is incredibly valuable, even if it’s only for short periods. Figure out how you can create more face time (not FaceTime). Start conversations and play games to spend time together as a family. Even better, get outside! If you’re willing to spend time with them and act a little silly, your kids will have more fun kicking a ball around rather than playing Roblox. Better yet, you’ll both get some exercise. Finally, consider the example you’re setting. It’s hard to blame kids for their screen addiction when adults also have trouble prying themselves away from laptops, tablets, and phones. Think about how you can reduce your own screen time and consider installing an app that tracks your usage like StayFree or Social Fever. You might be surprised at how much time you spend staring at a little screen — and be inspired to cut back.

Is your friend or client married to a controlling, manipulative, narcissistic husband?

OUR BOOKS CAN HELP!

The book can be downloaded for FREE at DivorceInformationBooks.com.

2 • BrucePA.com

ChartingtheFuture What to Consider When Making a Parenting Plan

Developing a custody agreement and parenting plan can be the most emotional part of a divorce. We all love our children and want as much time with them as possible, so the idea of not living with them 365 days a year can be hard to swallow. But in almost all cases, custody is split, and it’s best if you and your ex can come to an agreement together. That’s where parenting plans come in. A parenting plan documents how often you’ll see the kids, plus the logistical details. Will one parent have the kids during the week and another on the weekend? Will you trade off every other week? There are many other options, not to mention more questions. How will you handle pickups and drop-offs? Who gets the kids on different holidays? What if one of you travels for work?

everyone, and it will take time for kids to get used to living in multiple homes. Think about what will make this transition easiest for your child. If they’re old enough, ask them. Just proceed with caution because young children may tell you what they think you want to hear. Next, think about what’s best for the parents in ways that won’t interfere with what’s best for the child. Work schedules, where you live, proximity to the school, and more practical considerations will affect your plan. Some people are tempted to use the parenting plan as an opportunity to “get back” at their ex. Avoid that impulse. You’ll have to co-parent with your ex for many years, and vengeance isn’t putting your child’s needs first. Finally, remember you’re both human. It’s easy to forget in the middle of a divorce, but nothing is perfect, and things will go wrong. An emergency change or late drop-off doesn’t necessarily mean your ex is out to get you. Extend the same grace to them that you would for any other parent for one-off issues. Consider getting an attorney involved only if the problems become chronic or egregious. They’ll help ensure your plan is enforced and your schedule regains some predictability.

When considering all of these questions, parents should always put the needs of their children first. Divorce is a big adjustment for

Amber, Leesha, Sarina, Chris, Jenny, Rosalie, Kyla, and photographer Ashley in person at a BLF team meeting

Sweet and Spicy BBQ Chicken Skewers

Inspired by RecipeRunner.com

Summer is here, and you know what that means: It’s time to break out the barbecue and meat skewers!

Ingredients For the Marinade •

• •

Juice of 1 lime

1 tbsp olive oil 2 tbsp soy sauce

3/4 tsp smoked paprika

• • • •

• 1/2 tsp salt For the Skewers •

2 tbsp chili garlic sauce

2 tbsp rice vinegar

2 lbs chicken breast, cut into bite-size cubes 1 small pineapple, cut into 1-inch cubes

3 tbsp honey

•

Directions

1.

In a bowl, whisk together marinade ingredients.

2. In a reusable freezer bag, combine cubed chicken and all but 1/4 cup of the marinade. 3. Seal bag and massage marinade into the chicken. Chill in the fridge overnight. 4. The following day, preheat the grill to 400 F. Thread chicken and pineapple onto skewers, adding two cubes of chicken for each cube of pineapple. 5. Grill the skewers for 3–4 minutes per side, brushing with the reserved marinade in the final minutes. 6. Serve over rice or with your favorite barbecue sides! 561-810-0170 • 3

PRST STD US POSTAGE PAID BOISE, ID PERMIT 411

1601 Forum Pl. Ste. 1101 West Palm Beach, FL 33401

Ashley’s Father’s Day Tribute to Christopher page 1

Tips to Break Your Kids’ Phone Habits ConnectingWith Small Children page 2 Building Your Perfect Parenting Plan Sweet and Spicy BBQ Chicken Skewers page 3

How to Create a Mental Health Sanctuary in Your Home page 4

A Mindful Space

Creating a Mental Health Sanctuary in Your Home

Use natural light and calming colors. When designing your living space, try to incorporate as much natural light as possible. Regular exposure to sunlight gives you more energy, makes you happier, and even improves your appetite. If you’re painting, avoid any loud colors and use calming neutrals instead. Adding the right colors, natural light, and some plants will help create an aesthetic that will boost your mental health.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health Disorders, an estimated 26% of Americans over the age of 18 suffer from a diagnosable mental health disorder. With increases in the cost of living, the COVID-19 pandemic, and the rising tensions in Eastern Europe, that percentage could increase even more throughout the next few years. If you’re someone who struggles with mental health, you’ve probably tried all of the traditional methods to improve your situation, but have you made any adjustments to your actual home? If you’re unsure where to begin, try out these tips. Give each room purpose. One of the biggest interior design mistakes you can make is using a room for more than one thing. This is even more important if you work remotely. Each room should have a dedicated purpose. If you work from home, your office should not be in your bedroom or even in the area where you exercise. Plan out every bit of space that you have and add personal touches to it to remind you of what’s really important in your life. Get rid of distractions. Social media, mainstream news, and cellphones as a whole can have disastrous effects on your mental health. When you’re in your home, try to minimize your use of these technologies. If you’re not using the television, keep it off. Also, try to keep your home as clean as possible because clutter and dirt can easily bring you down.

4 • BrucePA.com