Douglass & Runger - July 2021

Douglass & Runger - July 2021

JULY 2021

The One Attorney Trope I Avoid MY PROMISE TO YOU

One habit shared by countless attorneys really bothers me, and I try really hard to not fall into this trope. The legal field is competitive, and our goal — in addition to fighting for those we represent — is to make sure our clients and potential clients know just how well-versed, experienced, and trustworthy we are in the areas of law we practice. This knowledge creates a powerful working relationship that benefits the client … but it also opens the door for lawyers to talk and talk and talk and talk . In other words, many lawyers will walk you through the sausage factory to tell you and show you how the sausage is made, even if you don’t like sausage. But in doing so, I believe attorneys oftentimes fail to actually listen because many of them are so caught up blabbing about their credentials, their cases results or trying to impress the client with all of their technical knowledge or expertise. When I saw that World Listening Day is on July 18, I knew I had to get up on my soapbox and advocate for the power that comes from listening, especially in a field that fails to do so on a regular basis. We try to be different at Douglass & Runger. It’s a point I drive home with my team every single day. Early on in my career, I realized my job wasn’t to drone on about legal matters and precedents, while bogging the client down or confusing the client unnecessarily about all of the technicalities of the law or various statutes. My job was to listen to my clients. I had to make them feel comfortable, learn about their hopes and fears, and get out of their way so I could actually help them. I mean, without clients, I don’t have a job!

But more importantly, when someone is actually listening to you, you begin to trust them. I need my clients to trust me, and I need to understand their situation fully to help them achieve their desired result. I’ve put a heavy emphasis on “active listening” into our firm’s core values, even from the moment of intake. Even if we cannot help the person inquiring about legal assistance, we are not dismissive of their particular situation. Not every legitimate legal concern or question warrants a free consultation with one of our attorneys, but our staff is going to respond to every request or inquiry with respect and guidance and listen to their situation with the objective of pointing them in the right direction, whether that’s with one of our attorneys or another firm. Everyone deserves to have their story heard. Furthermore, I’ve learned not to make judgments about the potential merits of a legal inquiry based solely off of how our intake coordinator may take notes or how the potential client may explain their legal situation to a staff member based off of his or her “independent legal research.” Many times individuals think they need a particular type of legal service they actually don’t need. I’ve come to understand that the best possible resource for what the problem is and what the ideal end result would be is to actually listen to what my clients have to say. That’s actually my secret weapon, too. After listening to a client’s problem and grasping the gravity of the situation, I always ask, “If you could have someone wave a magic wand and end this all today, what would you want that result to look like?" I then follow up with this

question, “If that’s your best-case result in a perfect world, what result could you live with?”

The client’s answer to these questions are incredibly instructive for me because from the get go, I understand exactly what it is they want and what would make them satisfied. Instead of sorting through all the anger and frustration that can accompany these cases, I’m given a clear answer at the outset as to what I need to do to best represent my clients’ needs just by deploying these questions. Listening to the clients’ needs and wants allows me to quickly ascertain a couple things. First and foremost is their desired result achievable and/or reasonable under the circumstances? Secondly, their answers help me ascertain the quickest and most cost- effective way to obtain this result for them. Or, if the answers to these questions lead me to believe their expectations are not realistic or that we wouldn’t be a good fit working together, I’m quickly able to either respectfully decline representation and offer them potential referrals for someone who may be a better fit. People don’t come to lawyers because they want to see them, hear about their accolades, or be lectured to by a grandstanding egomaniac; people come to attorneys for help during some of the most difficult times in their lives. My job is to use my expertise to help them recover from these moments, but if I don’t approach that task with sympathy, respect, and great listening skills, I won’t be able to succeed for my clients. This World Listening Day, I hope you take stock of how you listen. It’s a trait we could all improve on and value more.

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WHAT'S 'SUP? THE STAND-UP PADDLEBOARD CRAZE THAT NEVER WENT AWAY Unlike other crazes, the gear was simple and the activity beginner-friendly. To start, you only need a paddle, a board, a life preserver, and of course, a place to go! It’s a new way to see the water, which only boosted its popularity. Even veteran water sports enthusiasts weren’t used to standing on the water instead of sitting in a boat! But according to the industry’s own numbers, that popularity never died down. As it turns out, SUP is a good way to get around, and a lot of folks need that. Many cities, such as San Antonio, feature “paddling trails” that let SUP practitioners see the city in a new way or even commute via their board. How cool is that? If you’re looking for a new hobby this summer, it’s easy to rent a stand-up paddleboard and learn the basics. Take a class, head out into the water, and give it a shot. Who knows, you might be one of the thousands of Americans to discover a lifelong passion!

Outdoor and exercise crazes come and go almost as fast as hairstyles and popular app games do. But every once in a while, a trend comes along that remains popular — think karate, which spiked in the ‘60s and again in the ‘80s, and it can still be found in almost every American city to this day. Back in 2013, one such trend arose: the stand-up paddleboard, or SUP for short. The act of standing on a floating piece of wood in a surfboard shape and paddling (or poling) yourself along likely goes back thousands of years, but the SUP craze can be traced back to one man — and he’s not even in his 60s yet! That man is famous surfer Laird Hamilton, a household name in a sport that doesn’t usually generate them. And Laird, along with the Waikiki Beachboys, showed the world a new way to hit the water in the first decade of the 21st century.

Who Gets the Friends in the Divorce? Many questions accompany divorce, and the biggest among them includes “Who gets what?” And placing everything on a dividing line isn’t always easy. Case in point — who gets the friends when you divorce?

Some pals will be obvious. The friends you had before marriage, your coworkers and their spouses, and others who are more closely tied to your life than your ex-spouse’s should likely stay with you. If you’re happy with these friendships, then keep them! Where this turns gray is with the relationships you made during your marriage — especially with other couples. Unfortunately, as Pamela Cytrynbaum writes in Psychology Today, there isn’t a clear answer for this. Some couples choose to divide these friends along the “gender line.” The ex- wife gets the wives, the ex-husband gets the husbands, and everyone is happy with this arrangement. In other scenarios, some couples side with one spouse or the other, especially if there is infidelity or criminal action on the part of those getting divorce. In these situations, your friends decide for you .

2. Discuss friendships with your ex: It may be difficult to have a civil conversation with your ex right now, but if you can discuss friendships now, you could avoid turmoil and awkward situations in the future. 3. Consider this an opportunity: You know you have friendships that aren’t worth salvaging, and this major life change could be just the impetus to sever those ties for good. Don’t consider it a loss! It’s necessary to cut a friendship that isn’t serving you loose. (It just might happen on its own, too.) Some couples have added friendship details to their divorce. If you believe this is necessary, or if you have further questions about your divorce proceedings or other legal questions, please contact us today. You can also learn more at DouglassRunger.com.

However, you can follow a few guidelines when determining which friends belong to whom. This will ensure a peaceful transition, even if it does feel a little awkward.

1. Focus on your core group: You know who these people are. They are the 2–5 friends you couldn’t imagine your life without. Focus on these friendships. All of the others will fall in line when and if you need them.

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Water Safety for the Whole Family THINK ABOUT THIS BEFORE GOING FOR A DIP As temperatures outside soar, there’s no better way to cool down than to jump in the pool, river, or lake! But before you begin your summertime water adventures, it’s important to remember a few key safety tips. Consider this your go-to guide for water safety!

Plant-Based Blueberry Muffins

Life Jackets Are Necessary

Inspired by MyDarlingVegan.com

There’s a reason these handy tools have the word “life” in their name — they literally save lives! Everyone in your group should wear a U.S. Coast Guard-certified life jacket when boating, tubing, or swimming on the river or lake. This could prevent drownings and keep swimmers afloat in rough or deep waters. Inexperienced swimmers or young children should also wear life vests in pools.

It’s blueberry season! Whip up this simple muffin recipe to celebrate in style.

INGREDIENTS

• 1 cup soy milk • 1 tsp apple cider vinegar • 2 cups flour • 2 1/2 tsp baking powder • 1/4 tsp baking soda • 1/2 tsp salt

• 1/2 cup plus 2 tbsp sugar • 1/4 cup plus 2 tbsp canola oil • 1 tsp vanilla extract • Zest of 1 lemon • 2 cups fresh blueberries

Take Swimming Lessons

Sign your children up for swimming lessons each summer to help them develop the skills needed to swim through tough waters, avoid dangerous situations, and even apply first aid. In swimming courses, children are often taught pool safety and common guidelines for other bodies of water, equipping them with both the problem-solving and physical traits needed to enjoy the water safely. (Note: Adults who aren’t strong swimmers should take lessons, too!)

DIRECTIONS

Avoid Common Hazards

1. Preheat oven to 375 F. Grease a muffin tin and set aside. 2. In a bowl, combine soy milk and apple cider vinegar. Set aside. 3. In another bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Set aside. 4. In a third bowl, combine sugar, oil, vanilla extract, and lemon zest. Add milk mixture and stir, then add flour mixture. Stir to combine until well-incorporated but not smooth. Fold in the blueberries. 5. Spoon batter into muffin tin, filling each well 3/4 full. Bake 20–25 minutes, cool, and enjoy! INSPIRATION "There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind."

Sometimes any body of water will do on a summer day, but we beg you to be a little choosy. Before jumping into the lake, creek, pond, or river, confirm it’s a safe spot to swim by reading posted signs or contacting local municipalities. Many bodies of water can be off-limits for swimming or boating due to animal activity, contaminants, or commerce traffic. It’s also pertinent that you avoid alcohol when swimming to prevent accidental drownings, and always be mindful of the depth of pools. Stay away from drains, too!

Supervision Is Necessary

Don’t let your children swim alone! Watch young children as they swim in the pool and advise older children to swim with friends. Swimming alone puts the participant at risk of accidental drowning without someone there to notify authorities for help. It could be too late before anyone notices.

–C.S. Lewis

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Advertising Material

1 Why I’m All Ears 2 The Paddleboard Craze Is Here to Stay Do We Have to Share Our Friends After Divorce? 3 You’re Not Too Cool for Proper Water Safety Tips! Plant-Based Blueberry Muffins 4 These New Sports Are Coming to the Tokyo Olympics! Inside This Issue

5 New Sports Join the Olympic Roster in Tokyo

Skateboarding There are two categories: park and street. The street competition takes place on a linear course featuring “real world” elements like stairs and handrails, benches, planter boxes, and curbs. The park competition takes place within a more structured environment with a variety of slopes, curves, and other obstacles that will test skaters. Sport Climbing This event combines three different disciplines on an artificial climbing wall: bouldering, lead climbing, and speed climbing. In the bouldering competition, climbers will navigate a fixed route to be completed within a specified time. In lead climbing, climbers aim to reach the high point within a specified time. Finally, in speed climbing, two climbers race against one another. Men and women, 20 per gender, will

After a year delay, the Tokyo Olympics are once again gearing up for two weeks of action and excitement. Athletes from around the world are descending on Japan to give it their all and, hopefully, walk away with gold. This year, however, the games will be folding five new sports into the mix. Four of these sports have never been part of the Olympics, while one sport hasn’t been part of the games in over a decade. Here’s what to expect: Surfing Both men’s and women’s competitions will be held on Tsurigasaki Beach in Chiba Prefecture. Officials say due to the nature of the competition (being in open water), they’ll be generous with the scheduling. Depending on weather and waves, the preliminary round heats and head-to-head competitions may shift around as necessary.

compete against each other, with the top eight advancing to the final round.

Karate This martial art was developed in Japan in 1868, so it’s only appropriate to make its debut during the Tokyo Olympics. On top of that, the competitions will be held in Nippon Budokan, the site of the very first World Karate Championships in 1970. The Games will test two disciplines: kata (forms) and kumite (sparring). The sport will also be separated into men’s and women’s categories with three weight classes for each. Baseball and Softball These aren't new sports to the Olympics, but they were removed from the Games after Beijing in 2008. Baseball is hugely popular in Japan. This year, only six countries will take part in the baseball and softball competitions.

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