Staying Home Safe

Staying Home Safe

funded by

We acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the land in which we live and work, and pay respect to ancestors, elders both past, present and the emerging jarjums. Momentum Collective is committed to an inclusive and positive future for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island people(s).

CONTENTS

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ABOUT THIS BOOKLET

Crisis numbers

If you are in danger, call Police on 000 (or TTY 106). If you do not have a safe place to stay, call NSW Link2Home  1800 656 463 (available 24/7) If you are in a violent or abusive relationship and you need someone to talk to or referral to local services, call  National 1800 RESPECT on 1800 737 732 (24/7)

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HOME SAFETY

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SAFE ON COUNTRY, SAFE IN COMMUNITY

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SAFETY AT WORK OR ON CAMPUS

 NSW DVLine 1800 656 463 (24/7)  Rape Crisis Line 1800 424 017 (24/7)

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TRAVEL SAFETY

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ANIMAL SAFETY

For assistance to communicate  Translating and Interpreting Services 13 14 50  TTY 1800 67 14 42

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SAFETY FOR CHILDREN

*TTY numbers assist people who are deaf or speech impaired to message for support

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ONLINE AND PERSONAL INFORMATION SAFETY

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EMOTIONAL SAFETY

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MONEY SAFETY

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LEGAL SAFETY

Published by Third Sector Australia trading as Momentum Collective PO Box 793, Coolangatta Qld 4225

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HOUSING SUPPORT

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SPECIALIST CONTACTS

Copyright©2020 Momentum Collective All Rights Reserved. This booklet has been published for FREE distribution only and NOT for sale. Designed by Studio Empress.

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LOCAL CONTACTS FOR SUPPORTS

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ABOUT THIS BOOKLET

It is focused on you staying in your own home, or moving to a home of your choice, after the abusive person has left. It is developed with the Staying Home Leaving Violence program, which aims to prevent you and your children from becoming homeless or having to move away from your support system of family and friends, and community where you live. We acknowledge that survivors of domestic abuse include people of all ages, cultures, and identities. Please use this information in the way that is best for your situation, to be safe, protected and supported. Throughout the booklet and last pages are contact details for you to find support for your safety plan or if you feel confronted or upset by any of the content. This book is written to help you stay safe in your home and community after leaving domestic and family violence.

This booklet refers to AVO’s. Some people choose to apply

An Apprehended Violence Order (AVO) is a court order that aims to protect a person from another person that causes them to fear for their safety. An AVO can protect a person from: violence or threats of violence, stalking, intimidation, and harassment. An AVO can also protect property that has been damaged or threatened with damage. An AVO is sometimes called an Intervention Order, Restraining Order, Protection Order, Domestic Violence Order or Family Violence Order. There are two types of Apprehended Violence Orders (AVOs): - Apprehended Domestic Violence Orders (ADVOs) that protect a person from domestic violence, for example by a spouse, ex-partner, or parent. - Apprehended Personal Violence Orders (APVOs) that protect a person from violence by anyone else, for example a neighbour, co-worker, or friend. If a defendant does anything that an AVO says they can't do, they are in breach of the AVO. Breaching a AVO is a criminal offence and if a defendant is found guilty of breaching it, they can be fined or sent to prison.

for an AVO. LawAccess describes an AVO:

We also have three short videos about Staying Home Safe at mymomentum.org.au/roof/staying-home-safe/

About Momentum Collective

Momentum Collective is a community collective creating real social change and inclusive opportunities. Our vision is empowered people, connected communities, and our purpose is to help people get a roof, a job, live a better life and engage with the community. Please see www.mymomentum.org.au for more information about the community programs we operate. Momentum Collective wish to thank the many workers in the field who supported the development of the Staying Home Safe booklet.

© State of New South Wales (Department of Communities and Justice) www.justice.nsw.gov.au/Pages/copyright-disclaimer.aspx, LawAccess 2020

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HOME SAFETY

Outside the home

 Install sensor lights around your home so you will be alerted if someone is outside.  Lay gravel around the house so footsteps can be heard.  Ensure your property number is clearly visible day and night (so emergency services can find it easily).  Trim trees and shrubs to reduce hiding places and make it easy to see the street.  Secure your garage and garden shed with locks.  Keep wheelie bins in locked rear yard, or chain and lock them away from windows.  Lock away loose or heavy items and ladders when not in use.  Consider fitting your letterbox with a lock to restrict access to mail. You can also use a private post office box, so that your home address is not listed with services. (Australia Post offers free mailboxes - see Online Safety.)  The power board should be housed within a box to restrict tampering with the power supply. The box can be secured with a lock set approved by your electricity provider.  Guard against easy access to the rear yard with a fence or locked gate. NSW Federation of Housing Associations Inc and Q Shelter. (2017)

It’s important to make your home very secure, after you have left an abusive relationship.

Here is a list of security checks. Please seek specialist support with this home audit and ask for help with safety upgrade costs. In the home  Change the locks (often changing the barrels is a less expensive option). If renting, check the housing support section in this booklet.  Install security screen doors and always use a key to lock them. Darkened screening is also effective.  Always check who is at the front door before you open it.  Install and use a door peephole or video camera.  Keep keys out of view, in new storage spots, remove keys from doors and windows.  Where there is a security screen door, install perspex around the door handle.   Ensure windows are secure, with locks or dowel rods/sticks. If ventilation is required, lock it in a partially open position.   Ensure your home has smoke alarms installed and are working.  Install a solid door with a lock or security chain to an interior room where you have access to a phone. You can go to this room in an emergency, call the police and wait for them to arrive.  Install a security system with alarms, a camera, or movement sensors.  S ecure sky lights and manholes.

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Choose a special place where you can relax.

SUPPORT PEOPLE: NEIGHBOURS, FRIENDS, FAMILY

 If you feel comfortable, inform your neighbours that you are separated, and whether or not you have an ADVO that prohibits the abusive person from coming near or entering your home. Ask them to call the police if they see the person, or if they hear a disturbance at your home.  Ask for your neighbour’s phone number in case of emergency.  Arrange a code word with your family or friends. If you are in danger, and it is not safe for you to call the police directly, you may be able to call or text a friend. Use the code word to let them know that you are unsafe and that they should call the police.  Ask a trusted person to keep a copy of your important documents for safe-keeping.

PHONES AT HOME

 Carry your mobile phone, charged and switched on at all times.  Be confident about how to call emergency services quickly: save the police/help numbers in your speed dial.  Use your mobile caller ID (or answering machine) to screen calls.  Save text/voice messages from the abusive person as these can be used as evidence.  Change your phone number(s) and make them silent numbers.  Purchase a pre-paid emergency mobile phone.  If you are at high risk, ask a specialist service for a personal alarm which you can wear at all times.

Contacts for Home Security Support

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services NSW Police

131 444

Domestic Violence Line NSW

For counselling and referral to a local service 1800 65 64 63 (24/7) Translating and Interpreting Service 13 14 50 TTY 1800 67 14 42 facs.nsw.gov.au/domestic-violence/services-and- support/programs/staying-home-leaving-violence

Staying Home Leaving Violence (in some areas in NSW)

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Expressing yourself creatively can be healing: e.g., painting, art, singing, dancing, and writing.

SAFE ON COUNTRY, SAFE IN COMMUNITY

 Have someone you can talk to that you know will be confidential. Do you have an aunty, sister or worker you can trust?  If you feel safe to, let family and friends know that you are in a Domestic or Family Violence situation and whether or not you have an ADVO.  Ask trusted family and friends to visit you daily, if needed, and go with you to see mob or sorry business if you feel unsafe and want to attend.  If possible, don’t go to places where you feel unsafe from your abuser or family.

 Have your phone and essential things in a bag so you can be ready to leave if necessary.  Plan a safe place you can go if you are in danger and how you can get there.  Arrange a code word with your trusted family or friends, which lets them know that you are unsafe and that they should get help.  Reach out to a support service for help. Request an Aboriginal support worker if it helps you feel more comfortable and safe to share your story.

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services L ne - Victim’s Services Wirringa Baiya Aboriginal Women’s Legal Centre NSW

1800 019 123 Provides support to victims of crime with financial and counselling support

1800 686 587 wirringabaiya.org.au

Aboriginal Legal Services

1800 765 767 police charges, court matters. 1800 733 233 care, protection, family matters alsnswact.org.au Northern Rivers Freecall: 1800 633 637 acon.org.au , for sista girls and brother boys

ACON

Artwork donated by Tammy Johnson. The painting story: The blue circles represent family and community. The red reflects anger and suffering. The blue shapes represent the continued pain and damage to our families and communities, and the long healing process. The bright circle in the middle of the painting represents a meeting place; somewhere you can go to feel safe, whether it is on country, in community or with family and friends.

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SAFETY AT WORK OR ON CAMPUS

Being safe at work and at your place of study is important to ensure you are not disadvantaged to continue your employment or education after leaving violence. Here are some things you can do to keep yourself safe.

Your work/study safety plan

 Ask your employer to remove your contact information from name plates and directories that the public can see (in the building and on-line).  Ask your supervisor to be flexible and consider changes to your work site, shifts, schedule and/or department.  If you work in a place that visitors can easily see, ask to work somewhere else. Ask to be moved away from the front reception or any windows that people can look in.  Make a code word so your work or study mates know to call for help on your behalf.  Familiarise yourself with duress procedures: learn where help phones

 If you have an ADVO, make sure it includes the work/study place.  Keep a record of all incidents and how the abusive behaviour affects you, your work and your workplace.  Complete a workplace/campus incident report, each time if you are threatened.  Give security or reception a recent photo or description of your abuser to recognise if they come on site.  Ask a co-worker or your supervisor to screen your calls. Agree on how to handle a call from the abuser.  Ask for a new phone number.  Block e-mail from your abuser.  Check that your listed emergency contacts are up to date.

If you feel comfortable, tell your employer/education supervisor about your situation and let them know you may need support to stay safe. If you can’t talk to your direct employer/supervisor, find another staff member you can trust and ask them to support you. Create a safety plan with your manager/supervisor/trusted person. Discuss what help and protection they can provide in case your abuser comes to, or contacts, your work or study place, such as:  what will help you be safer, less stressed and more supported at work/study?

 what leave provisions are available. All employees are entitled to five days of unpaid family and domestic violence leave each year of their employment. You can take this leave to make arrangements for your (or for a close relative’s) safety to move house, attend court hearings, or talk with police. You can also apply for sick leave, carer’s leave, annual leave and flexible working/ study arrangements.

or emergency buttons are. © Centre for Research & Education on Violence Against Women & Children. Make it Our Business, 2020

© Fair Work Ombudsman www.fairwork.gov.au

Fair Work Ombudsman

fairwork.gov.au/leave/family-and-domestic- violence-leave

 what supports or extensions you may need to complete your work or study if you are not feeling emotionally well.

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TRAVEL SAFETY

Cuddling and playing with your pets is one way to help you feel good

 Change your routine: take a different route or park in different places if it is safe to do so.  Ask for a well-lit, safer parking spot near your work/ study place, preferably monitored by a camera.  Keep your car locked at all times.  Tint the windows on your car.  Arrange a work/study mate or security person to walk you to your car/transport.  Carry a loud whistle under your clothes.  Learn where emergency phones are on campus, and how to call for help.  Call or text ahead to let colleagues and home know your expected times of arrival. Make a plan with them if you don’t arrive.  Give your supervisor the number of a trusted person they can call if you don’t turn up and they can’t contact you.  Look for tampering or tracking devices that may be attached on or underneath your car.

ANIMAL SAFETY

We love our pets and want to protect them. If you are concerned for your pet’s safety, here are a few suggestions for safety planning with pets.

If you have your pets living with you:  Keep pets indoors (if possible).  Avoid leaving pets outside alone.  Pick a safe route and time to walk pets.  Don’t exercise or walk pets alone.  Change your veterinarian.

National Domestic Violence Hotline, 2014

If you can’t look after your pets for a while, here are some options:  Ask family or friends to have pets at their place.

 Ask RSPCA NSW to look after your pet through their Domestic Violence Program. They can arrange foster accommodation and/or emergency pet boarding, financial assistance for vet treatment, impound fees or transport fees.  Book your pet into a kennel.  Ask your vet about who may be able to foster your pets.

“Trauma creates change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.” ~ Michelle Rosenthall​

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services RSPCA Domestic olence P ogram

02 9782 4408 weekdays or 02 9770 7555 on weekends and public holidays

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SAFETY FOR CHILDREN

Safety planning with your kids

program (see your local services).  Train children in age-appropriate safety precautions such as keeping doors and windows locked at all times (see the Home Safety chapter in this book).  If your child has a mobile phone or any online accounts, discuss online safety with them (see the Online Safety chapter in this book).

A safety plan should include ways that your children can stay safe if violence occurs. Safety planning with your kids can be difficult depending on their age, maturity, and willingness. Please seek help from specialist child and family services if you need to. Find a calm time to talk through plans with your kids  Ask your child what they do to make them feel safe when they are scared and support them to do those things if they need to. For example, a place to go to when they’re afraid.  Teach your children when and how to call emergency service ‘000’.  Practice your home address with them so they remember. (You can write it on a card next to the phone.)  Practice with them about where to go if there is danger: for example, a neighbour’s house.  Choose a code word that you can say when your children need to leave the home in case of an emergency.  Teach the children that although they want to protect their parent, it is very important that they never intervene.  Help children to make a list of safe people that they can talk to.  Older children may need to choose the people that know about their personal information, so support them to feel in control if needed.  Enroll them in a counselling

The safety of children after leaving a violent relationship is vital. Take precautions to make sure your kids have safe arrangements. Make a plan with your kids so they can protect themselves.

School/Child Care/Sport Coaches and Other Carers It is important that other people who may be caring for your child understand your circumstances and for a safety plan to be made with them.  Put in writing who has authorisation to pick up your child. Provide a copy of your family court orders or ADVO so they can call the police if the abuser attempts to pick up your child.  Provide the carers with a photograph of the abusive person.  Let the school know you don’t want pictures of your

 Request the school/carer to alert appropriate staff about the situation: such as school

counsellor, receptionist, teachers and principal,

Planning for kids visiting their other parent/carer

sports coaches, after school activity providers or other caretakers.  Remind your child to stay with their teacher/coach on duty and wait together for their transport (bus or authorised person picking them up).  Ask the teacher/coach on duty to meet the bus or car on arrival and walk your child to their class or activity if you are unable to take them.

If you are concerned for your children’s safety when they visit their other parent/carer, develop a safety plan for while they are at another home.  Brainstorm with your children to come up with ways that they can stay safe using the same model as you would for your own home. Have them identify where they can get to a phone, how they can leave the house, and who they can go to.  If it’s safe to do so, give the children a mobile phone, that can be used to call emergency services or a safe person.  T he other parent may ask the child about what you do, where you work or other family activities. Help your child practice saying things to the other parent that aren’t giving away too much information about you.

children shared on line. School needs consent to post a child’s picture.

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ONLINE & PERSONAL INFORMATION SAFETY

Plan a fun or relaxing activity before and after children exchanges

to keep yourself emotionally safe

It is important to take precautions about your (and your children’s) personal information on the web, email and other records.

Planning for Safe Child Handovers

to see what comes up and ask to have your personal information protected/ removed.  Think of other places your contact details may be listed and make your details silent. These could include: - changing your electoral enrolment to 'silent elector’. You can apply to have your address taken off the electoral roll by going to the Australian Electoral Commission website. - pet registration: contact the local council to ask that they don’t pass on your contact information.  Apply to Australia Post for free 12-month mail redirection or Post Office Box. You will need proof of identity and documentation from police, agency or an intervention order.

 Change all your passwords/ passcodes/pins on all your devices so no one else can open them. Choose a strong password that no one could figure out and keep it private.  Remove your abuser’s details as your emergency contact where needed, such as work/study/sport groups  Make a list of all your accounts such as utilities, mygov, Centrelink, bank accounts, doctors, insurances and work through the list: - Make sure only you can access these accounts (make new ones if necessary). - Remove your abuser’s permissions to receive or give information on the accounts. - Remove as much of your personal information from the internet as you can. Do a web search for your name, phone number, address

 Avoid exchanging custody at your home or your ex-partner’s home.  Meet in a safe, public place, for example a police station, or another area where there are people and cameras.  Bring a friend or relative with you to the exchanges, or have them make the exchange.  If you plan for the other parent/carer to pick the children up from school, or activities, make sure you tell the school when this is happening.

National Domestic Violence Hotline, 2013

Children’s Safety Contact details

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Kids Help Line

1800 55 1800 kids from 5 to 25 years old can call for counselling kidshelpline.com.au 1300 1300 52 Support to respond to your child’s behaviour; improving family relationships & wellbeing

Parent Line NSW

Reach Out

au.reachout.com online chat support for young people

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Headspace

headspace.org.au mental health support for young people

Bursting the Bubble

burstingthebubble.com information for teenagers about domestic violence

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Turn off Location Tracking, GPS and Bluetooth  Mobile phones and social media apps have tracking devices that can tell someone where you are, including on the photos you take. Make sure that location tracking in your device settings is turned off. (You may need to web search how to do this for each app and on your device.) Avoid Spyware  Mobile phones (and other devices) may have spyware installed. If you suspect this, get a new phone. Do not reinstall the new phone from a backup, as this may install the spyware from the old phone.  Update your software as these contain security updates.  Install anti-virus protection on all your devices. Social Media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or other accounts)  Be careful about what you post! Don’t mention or show photos of where you are or where you are going.  Consider deleting your account. You can deactivate your account, but all of your information will be saved internally. To avoid this, you can permanently delete your profile (and set up another one in another name).  Tagging: change settings to prevent tagging and ask friends not to tag you or your children in any posts.

To avoid being contacted  Block the abuser’s details from your devices such as phone numbers, email addresses, and social media accounts. If you need to be in contact with your abuser  Contact them through a person you trust, such as a family member or a service provider.  Make a separate email address for communications with the abuser.  Make sure not to open attachments from them in emails or messages, as these may contain spyware.  Make your number private through your device settings or call from another phone. Save old abusive messages for legal evidence  Print, save or record previous emails, texts, phone or other messages if they are abusive, numerous or threatening so that they can be used as evidence in court. To be able to prove that the abuser sent these messages, you need to print out the messages with the “header” which shows the account information of the sender, or take screen shots of social media, as posts can be deleted by the sender.  Provide these to the police, courts, or a trusted worker or friend to keep them safe. Remember that once you give them safely to someone else, you no longer need to keep that record if it harms your emotional wellbeing.

Online safety contact details

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services WESNET

Women’s Technology Safety and Privacy Toolkit: techsafety.org.au/resources/resources-women/

www.facs.nsw.gov.au/domestic-violence/stay-safe/ online-and-technology www.esafety.gov.au detailed information on esafety for all the family

Department of Communities & Justice e Safety Commissioner NSW

Australia Post – free mail boxes or mail redirection

auspost.com.au/receiving/manage-your-mail/ redirect-hold-mail/redirect-mail/free-mail-redirection- and-po-boxes

Other useful Apps

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Daisy

www.1800respect.org.au/daisy/ to connect women to support near them for women with disability who have experienced violence or abuse 1800respect.org.au/sunny free app that enables women to track details of abusive behavior (be aware of your safety: who can access your phone)

Sunny

Arc App

Recognise your strength in coming this far

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EMOTIONAL SAFETY

Reach out for help Please see below for mental health support if you are struggling emotionally.

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Lifeline - ph e cris s support

13 11 14 lifeline.org.au

Survivors of abuse can experience changes to their mental health, even after leaving an abusive relationship. These may include anxiety, isolation, irritability, intrusive thoughts, shame, depression, or negative self-image. It can be helpful to know that traumatic events affect people in all kinds of ways and there is nothing wrong with you if you find yourself struggling to heal.

releases dopamine, a chemical related to the brain’s pleasure centres, which increases self-esteem. Whether it’s writing, painting, playing music or craft, it’s important to release the trauma in ways that engage our mind and body.

Mental Health Access Line

1300 224 636 or chat online beyondblue.org.au (includes relaxation tips) 1800 011 511 (24/7) to connect with local Mental Health services thehotline.org/2016/03/31/5-self-care-tips-for-abuse- and-trauma-survivors/ (USA-based) domesticshelters.org/articles/safety-planning/an- emotional-safety-plan-in-4-steps helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/coping-with-emo- tional-and-psychological-trauma.htm

Beyond Blue – mental health support

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Webl nks for self are

© National Domestic Violence Hotline (2019)

Keep healthy habits: It’s easier to cope if you eat well, sleep well and avoid drugs and alcohol. Calm yourself: Find out what regulates your nervous-system: eg music, patting a pet, breathing and mindfulness (apps available). Connect with others : Try to see people if possible. Catch up with people you know or old contacts, or attend support groups or activities.

Some recovery tips:

Self Care Plan Fill in how you can take care of yourself.

Move your body: It’s important to find a physical outlet for intense emotions. Do something that you’re passionate about and love to do: e.g. dancing, home work-out, sport. Be creative: Any repetitive action (sewing, gardening, yoga, drawing, etc.)

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MONEY SAFETY

It’s important to be in control of your money to achieve independence. To control your money and keep your finances safe, consider these tips.

Financial and Budgeting Help Contacts

Secure bank account Make sure you have a bank account that only you can access. Talk to your bank to organise this if needed. To ensure that you are receiving your own income into your bank account, talk to a Centrelink social worker, or your employer. Financial Counselling If you feel overwhelmed by debt, contact a financial counsellor, as soon as you can. Financial counselling is a free and confidential service offered by community organisations, community

 bills or fines you're struggling to pay  being harassed by debt collectors  gas, electricity or phone disconnection  being evicted from your house  car accidents with no insurance  tax debts Needing Financial Support? Contact support services and your bank, who may help with many financial needs such as:  support for rental or mortgage payments (see Housing chapter)  e mergency relief including food, clothing, sanitary items  crisis accommodation  property safety upgrades   moving or maintaining a tenancy © Australian Securities & Investments

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Centrelink

132 850 to claim for Crisis Payment, or online (other languages 131 202). Hearing or speech impairment 1800 810 586 (TTY phone required). moneysmart.gov.au/managing-debt/financial-coun- selling 1300 371 288 salvationarmy.org.au/need-help/ financial-assistance/ penda-app.com A financial empowerment mobile phone app for women experiencing domestic and family violence 1800 007 007 Free and confidential advice from pro- fessional financial counsellors

Financial Counsellors Moneysmart

Salvation Army – Emergency Relief

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Penda App

National Debt Helpline

Mortgage Stress Handbook, Legal Aid

legalaid.nsw.gov.au/publications

Free Food or Food Banks

search for food on hsnet.nsw.gov.au or askizzy.org.au

legal centres and some government agencies. Financial counsellors are

Budgeting

skilled professionals. They will listen to your problems and help you with things like:

See next page an example of a fortnightly budget to keep track of your expenses. You can copy this and reuse it, or find another budget style that suits your needs. Mobile apps can also be another great way of tracking your expenditure, on the go, on your smart phone.

I control my spending and can balance my budget.

Commission. Reproduced with permission. Moneysmart (n.d.)

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LEGAL SAFETY

Fortnightly Budget

Income

$ Amount

Notes

Wage Centrelink Payments Child Support / Other Total income: Expenses Regular costs Rent or Mortgage & Rates Electricity/Gas Water Fuel/Car/Transport Phone (s) & Internet Insurance - Car Insurance - House/Health Food

You have a right to be protected from violence. Having to tell your story for legal processes can be stressful, so please use support services to help.

Apprehended Domestic Violence Order (ADVO) If you are worried about the abusive person contacting or approaching you, you may wish to apply for an ADVO, or an Apprehended Domestic Violence Order, which is a type of court order, from your local Police Station. To obtain an ADVO you will need to make an application at your local Magistrates’ Court. This is a legal hearing. You may be required to tell the magistrate what has happened and, in some cases, present any other evidence you have. The best way to prepare for a legal hearing is to seek legal advice. A Women’s Court Advocacy Service or a lawyer can explain how the process works, what evidence there is and what your options are. Once the ADVO is made and given to the abusive person, the police have the power to arrest, detain, or charge them if they break its conditions. An application for an ADVO can be made by: - a police officer on your behalf - you personally through the Local Court

You will need to provide as much of the following information as you can:  the full name, address, date of birth (if known) of the person you want protection from  the names of anyone else you want protected by the order, such as: children, other family members who have lived with, or are living with you  all places you want your abuser to stay away from (places where you or your children attend)  details of the incidents that are causing you to fear the defendant, including the most recent incident  details of any reports or statements made to the police, including any event numbers  details of any medical reports or treatment by a doctor or hospital relating to any injuries caused by the defendant  evidence of any damage to property (for example photos)  the defendant’s history of violence, use of alcohol or other drugs, or access to weapons  information about any mental health issues  other court orders that have been made in the past to protect you from the defendant © State of New South Wales (Department of Communities and Justice), LawAccess NSW, 2020

Loan / Debt Credit Card

Medical Savings Eating out Entertainment School Expenses Other Total Expenses: Income - Expenses:

Source:© Relationships Australia (2007)

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Breaches of AVO and incidents - Always call the police if there is a breach of your ADVO. -  Keep a diary of any contact with the abusive person. Record anything that made you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. Write down the details of any conversation and any threatening or intimidating statements. This will be very helpful if you have to go to court. There’s a form on the next page to write them down. -  As you might have to repeat your story several times, write a timeline of the relationship. A case worker can assist with this.

NSW Legal Contact details:

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Women’s Domestic olence Court Advocacy Service (WDVCAS)

1800 938 227 or 1800 WDVCAS Provides women and their children who have experienced domestic and family violence with information, advocacy and referrals search for locations alsnswact.org.au 1800 765 767 for police charges and court matters 1800 733 233 for care, protection and family matters 1300 888 529 lawaccess.nsw.gov.au A free telephone service that provides legal information, referrals and in some cases, advice for people who have a legal problem in NSW.

Aboriginal Legal Services

LawAccess NSW

Aboriginal Contact Line - Victim’s Services Women's Legal Services NSW

1800 810 784 wlsnsw.org.au Domestic Violence Legal Service

For calming: apps such as mindfulness, breathing, or yoga exercises can help.

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HOUSING SUPPORT

Changing the locks

Being placed on a tenancy ‘blacklist’

If you have an ADVO that stops the perpetrator of violence from living in the property, you can change the locks, but you need to provide copies of the keys to the landlord within seven days, unless the ADVO is against the landlord.

Your landlord or real estate agent cannot blacklist you by putting your name on a bad tenant >Page 1 Page 2-3 Page 4-5 Page 6-7 Page 8-9 Page 10-11 Page 12-13 Page 14-15 Page 16-17 Page 18-19 Page 20-21 Page 22-23 Page 24-25 Page 26-27 Page 28-29 Page 30-31 Page 32-33 Page 34-35 Page 36-37 Page 38-39 Page 40

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