Stevens Firm - December 2019

Tips for Getting Through the Holidays What Matters Most THE StevensFirm, P.A. Family Law Center 349 E. Main Street, Suite 200, Spartanburg, SC 29302 • www.SCFamilyLaw.com • (864) 598-9172 December 2019

And it’s December, already. Somehow the entire year of 2019 just flew by, and while it still feels like it was Christmas just the other day, apparently the holidays are upon us once again. How are you? Are you doing okay? Have you bought all the gifts on your list yet? Or are you like me, getting gifts for various loved ones and friends right up until Christmas Eve? I’m here to tell you, “It’s okay!” Some of us absolutely love the holidays. Take Caitlin, one of our out-of-this-world paralegals, for instance. She’s like our own living, breathing, Cindy- Lou Who. (If you don’t believe me, look at the picture insert!) She loves the holidays. She goes to parades, gets pictures made with Santa, and loves Christmas gift shopping and Christmas carols. She’s our director of holiday cheer at every firm holiday party. And then, there are those of us who may be dealing with loss or sad anniversaries around the holidays. Whether your family or friends are no longer here with us to celebrate or separations or divorces have affected whom you celebrate your holidays with or when you celebrate your holidays with loved ones, the sadness can be difficult to manage. Here are some tips to help stay focused on what we believe is the real meaning of the holiday season:

friends to spend your holiday with this year, donate your time to a local charity helping to provide holiday meals to the needy. There are several in most communities, and these events can do wonders for the soul of someone missing loved ones during the holidays. 2. Go shopping for Toys for Tots: Every year, thousands of children in every community do not have a traditional Santa visit to provide gifts under their trees. Toys for Tots to the rescue! This wonderful charity gives back by providing brand-new donated toys to these families so every child will experience the joy of waking up to Santa’s gifts on Christmas morning. There are donation drop-off locations throughout the country, and a simple search on their website, ToysForTots.org, will show you the locations nearest to you.

3. Start new traditions: If you’re facing the holidays for the first time following a separation or divorce, now is the perfect time to start some new traditions. Maybe you and the kids can open all your gifts on Christmas Eve instead of Christmas Day. Maybe instead of having a formal holiday meal, you and the kids prefer to have a holiday meal made up entirely of whatever take- out food is open on the holiday (and deliver holidays goodies to those food-service workers who have to work on the holiday). Maybe you visit the relatives who might not have really enjoyed your ex-spouse’s company to brighten their holiday this season. The possibilities are endless. Be creative, and if you have kids, involve them in the process of starting new traditions. This will be our family’s first holiday season without our matriarch, Ben’s mother, Jean. We miss her tremendously (and the new Apple holiday commercial is hereby banned in my household since I can’t watch it without bursting into tears!), but she would not want us to miss out on celebrating together and enjoying the new memories we will share with each other going forward for many years to come. No matter your reason for change this year, if the holidays will be tough for you, please know you are in all of our thoughts throughout this holiday season.

1. Give your time to a favorite nonprofit or other charity: If you don’t have family or

Wishing you the very best this holiday seasons and into the new year from our family to yours,

–Jenny & Ben Stevens

Reminder About Our Firm’s Communication Policy Our promise to you is that while we are working on your case, we don’t take inbound phone calls, faxes, or emails. Our Senior Partner, Ben Stevens, takes no unscheduled inbound phone calls, as we have found this makes him much more productive and enables him to focus on getting your case resolved faster. You can always call our office at (864) 598-9172 and schedule an in-person or phone appointment with any of our attorneys, usually within 24–48 hours. We believe this approach is much better than the endless game of phone tag played by most businesses today. Email is also an efficient way to communicate with us, but please

be advised that emails are not typically checked more than twice per day. If you need something quickly, don’t email — call our office and speak with one of our assistants, who will be happy to help you. Disclaimer: This publication is intended to educate the general public about family law issues. It is not intended to be legal advice. Every case is different. The information in this newsletter may be freely copied and distributed so long as the newsletter is copied in its entirety and proper credit is attributed to “The Stevens Firm, P.A. — Family Law Center (SCFamilyLaw.com).”

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The Joy of a Gingerbread House

Everything You Didn’t Know About This Holiday Tradition

Of the many seasonal traditions that sweep our nation, few are as creative, delicious, and satisfying as building your very own gingerbread house. Whether you’re looking to create a simple table decoration or bake a tasty treat to nibble on, everyone can enjoy this holiday activity! The Origins of Gingerbread Ginger was first cultivated in ancient China, then traded into medieval Europe. There, Europeans incorporated it into culinary traditions and used it to bake cookies into elaborate shapes and works of art, including figures of animals and people. The gingerbread house first appeared in the early 19th century in Germany. Although historians don’t know an exact date, it’s speculated that it gained popularity around the same time that “Hansel and Gretel,” the popular fairy tale recorded by the Brothers Grimm, was published. The Largest Gingerbread House In 2013, the world record for the largest gingerbread house in the world was broken. The house, topping out at 21 feet and covering 2,520 square feet, was built by Traditions Golf Club in Bryan, Texas, to raise money for a local Level II

trauma center. To construct the house, builders created a recipe that required 1,800 pounds of butter, 2,925 pounds of brown sugar, 7,200 eggs, 7,200 pounds of flour, 1,080 ounces of ground ginger, and a few additional ingredients. Build Your Own! While you don’t have to challenge yourself to beat the Guinness World Record, you can still have fun creating your very own gingerbread village. Starting your gingerbread house from scratch can be a fun activity for the whole family to enjoy. Give the kids a chance to mix the ingredients, roll out the dough, and set out plenty of candies and frostings to use, and remember to have fun! If you’re looking for unique gingerbread house ideas, take a look at 20 gingerbread

house ideas at TasteofHome.com/ collection/gingerbread-houses.

Your Pretrial Preview

What Happens at a South Carolina Family Court Pretrial Hearing?

If you’re embroiled in a divorce or child custody case that has been dragging on for months and is approaching its 365-day limit, then one of the attorneys involved might have requested a pretrial hearing. Thanks to the word “trial,” that sounds a bit intimidating, but really, it’s just an attempt to get things back on track. So, what exactly happens at a pretrial hearing? That’s a question our clients ask all the time, and the answer is simple: not much. Basically, a pretrial hearing serves as a check-up on your case. It’s a short hearing, usually 15–20 minutes, that allows the attorneys, parties, judge, and any other necessary participants to come together and discuss the status of any outstanding trial preparation issues. The judge usually asks one or both attorneys to present the status of the case and outline any issues that need court-ordered deadlines to help the case move forward. For example, if discovery hasn’t been completed by one or both sides, or if mediation hasn’t been scheduled, the judge will issue a final deadline for it. The judge will also ask the attorneys for an estimated number of witnesses and how many days of trial they’ll need if mediation is unsuccessful, so that the docket clerk can reserve time for a trial. At the end of the hearing, everyone leaves the courtroom with a much better idea of where the case stands and what the important dates will be going forward.

Many of our clients tell us they like these hearings because they offer a light at the end of the tunnel. Family Court litigation can be a long and expensive process, so having a short order from a family court judge detailing everyone’s responsibilities and obligations, and putting firm dates and deadlines in place, can feel like a win. As simple as it might sound, it’s still not a good idea to face down a pretrial hearing without an experienced family law attorney at your side. If you’re struggling with or about to begin a divorce or child custody case, call The Stevens Firm today to schedule a consultation. We’d be happy to answer your questions and put your mind at ease.

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Classic Roast Chicken • 1 chicken, approx. 5–6 lbs • Kosher salt • Freshly ground pepper • 1 large bunch fresh thyme, 20 sprigs removed • 1 lemon, halved • 1 head garlic, cut in half crosswise Ingredients

• 2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted • 1 large yellow onion, thickly sliced • 4 carrots, peeled and cut into 2-inch pieces • Olive oil

All I Want for Christmas is You

Tips for a Successful Second Marriage

Directions

A divorce is the end of an era and can be heartbreaking and even traumatic. Many people leave their first marriages sure they’ll never love again — but according to statistics on remarriage, they couldn’t be more wrong! This holiday season, we want to remind you that new love, and potentially wedding bells, are just around the corner. According to the Pew Research Center, in 2013, 4 in every 10 new marriages included at least one person who had been married before, and the odds of remarriage are particularly good (well above 50%) for people in their late 30s, 40s, 50s, and early 60s. That said, it’s wise to enter a new marriage with caution. Here are two things to think about when combining lives with a new spouse: A Prenup Is More Important Than Ever Because it protects both parties, signing a prenuptial agreement before marriage is always a wise move. However, it’s even more important for a second marriage. Often when people marry for the first time, they’re still young without substantial assets or established careers. In a second marriage, both parties often have a lot more to lose. There is no shame in asking your soon-to-be-spouse for a prenup — just remember to have an experienced family law attorney working with you to ensure all of your bases are covered. Communication Is Key Going into a new marriage, it’s wise to air out past legal conflicts. Fill your new partner in on the details of your child custody agreements and any alimony or child support you give or receive regularly. This transparency will save you a lot of hassle when combining households and finances. Similarly, bringing children from one marriage into another can be tricky, and there is no “right” way to do it. Open lines of communication with your kids and consider counseling to ease the transition. Above all else, before you enter into your second marriage, it’s vital you consult a family law attorney. Our team here at The Stevens Firm can guide you through the legal side of the process and ensure you’re complying with your child custody and visitation agreements. Email us today at [email protected] or call 864-598-9172 to schedule a consultation.

1. Heat oven to 425 F. 2. Rinse chicken inside and out, removing giblets if included. Move to a work surface, pat dry, and liberally season with salt and pepper. Stuff cavity with thyme bunch, lemon halves, and garlic head. Brush outside with butter, and then season again. Tie chicken legs together with kitchen string. 3. Meanwhile, in a roasting pan, toss onions and carrots in olive oil and season with salt, pepper, and 20 sprigs of thyme. 4. Place the chicken on the vegetables and roast for 1 1/2 hours. 5. Remove from oven, and let stand for 20 minutes covered with foil. 6. Slice and serve with the vegetables.

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PAGE 1 Tips for Getting Through the Holidays PAGE 2 Building Your Own Gingerbread House A Look Behind the Pretrial Curtain PAGE 3 Classic Roast Chicken

Make Your Second Marriage a Success PAGE 4 The History Behind Christmas Lights

Light Up the Night

Why Do We Hang Christmas Lights?

The first string of twinkling lights illuminating your neighbor’s house is always a telltale sign of the upcoming seasonal festivities. Christmas lights are a holiday staple, but have you ever wondered where this beloved tradition started? The tradition of hanging lights on the tree originally started with candles. Because this posed an immense fire hazard, Edward Hibberd Johnson, a close friend of Thomas Edison and vice president of the Edison Electric Light Company, vowed to find a better way to decorate Christmas trees with light. In December 1882, three years after Edison’s invention of the light bulb in November 1879, Johnson hand-wired 80 red, white, and blue light bulbs together and wound them around a Christmas tree in his parlor window. A passing reporter saw the spectacle and declared in the Detroit Post and Tribune, “One can hardly imagine anything prettier.” Johnson continued this tradition, increasing the number of lights each year and eventually putting them up outside. But because electricity was still a new concept, many years passed before the fad took off for regular Americans. In 1923, President Calvin Coolidge began the tradition of lighting the National Christmas Tree, which spurred the idea of selling stringed lights commercially. By the 1930s, families everywhere were

buying boxes of bulbs by the dozen. Today, an estimated 150 million Christmas lights are sold in America each year, decorating 80 million homes and consuming 6% of the nation’s electricity every December. Whether you’ll be putting up your own lights or appreciating the most impressive light displays in your neighborhood or town, let the glow fill you with joy this season. Just don’t leave them up until February!

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