The Bledsoe Firm - June 2021

The Bledsoe Firm - June 2021

The Bledsoe Firm JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551 JUNE | 2021

that took the world by storm — but today’s kids might not be familiar with them, at least outside of the screen. The Challenge of Entertaining Kids W ith school out for the summer, kids are looking for something to do. If you are a parent, you likely have a long list for them SUMMER READING KEEPS BOREDOM AT BAY

— chores are a good one. There is always something to do around the house. Of course, no matter their age, they are going to grumble about doing chores. For older kids, summer jobs are a great option. Many places are hiring, especially in retail and food services. These two industries give young people great experience before they finish high school and head off to college. But if that also fails to hit the mark, you can always fall back on the tried-and-true summer activity: reading. One of the great things about reading is you can do it anywhere. Read at home, in the car, on the airplane, on the beach, or wherever you are. Though my kids are grown, I clearly remember the challenge with reading: finding an engaging book they will connect with. The hardest page to turn is the first one. But if you can get to that point, it gets easier from there — for everyone. These days, books have a lot of competition. Kids have all kinds of distractions, like streaming shows, movies, and video games. It takes a lot of effort to pull them from their distractions. Even taking them to the bookstore and letting them pick out their own books might not be enough, depending on their age.

‘Jurassic Park’ by Michael Crichton, 1990 While many kids are more familiar with the “Jurassic World” movies, the source material for Steven Spielberg’s

“Jurassic Park” is a classic in its own right. The novel is remarkably fast-paced, fun, thrilling, and a fairly easy read for older kids. It’s almost like reading a summer blockbuster in itself. And like most books that are made into movies, it is better than the movie! ‘The Lord of the Rings’ by J.R.R. Tolkien, 1954 For today’s attention spans, “The Fellowship of the Ring,” “The Two Towers,” and “The Return of the King” may be a little harder to get into. The writing style isn’t something most kids are used to. It’s flowery and takes its time. But it’s worth it! If kids don’t want to commit to the three-volume series on book, the audiobook is also an option (this is great for younger kids). ‘The Princess Bride’ by William Goldman, 1973 This book is a little different because it doesn’t exist, at least not in a traditional book. Most of us are familiar with the 1987 movie in which a grandfather reads his grandson a story. That book isn’t real, either. Yes, “The Princess Bride” is a book, but it was written as an abridged version of a fictional book also called “The Princess Bride.” The great thing about this book is that it's easy for kids to get into and enjoy. It’s an inconceivable mix of comedy, fantasy, and romance. While there are plenty of other examples to choose from, these three make a good starting point. They’re stories your kids may already be familiar with, which makes them easier to get into as books. As they turn from one page to the next, they’ll quickly discover these books have more to offer than the movies — more characters, more detail, and more to explore. If your kids are complaining about not having anything to do, start by handing out a few chores, and then introduce them to a few great books. —John Bledsoe

So, make a few suggestions. Put a book in front of them and see what happens. Here are a few classics

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DIY OR BUY? Lawn Games for Family Summer Fun

T he warm summer sun may be enough to beckon your family outdoors, but lawn games will guarantee hours of fun outside. If you’re handy, there are plenty of great lawn games you can make yourself. If not, buy an off-the-shelf alternative and enjoy the easy setup.

and you’re ready to go! Many DIY plans are available online, including one from HousefulOfHandmade.com/ultimate-diy-horseshoe-pit.

Buy: Check out the kid-friendly rubber horseshoe set from Wayfair.com, which requires no installation, can be used indoors or alongside your outdoor game, and is safe for younger children.

Giant Jenga: Easy DIY All you need to build a giant Jenga tower are

Cornhole: Advanced DIY The humble beanbag may be the most versatile backyard game piece. It’s used in the popular game commonly known as cornhole. To build your own cornhole set, you’ll need a couple of sheets of 1/2-inch-thick plywood along with two-by-fours, some hardware, and a variety of tools including a drill, jigsaw, and sander. Visit DIYPete.com/cornhole-board-plans to get both written and video instructions. Buy : Ready to play ASAP? Cornhole sets are available from many large retailers around summertime, or you can order a customized set featuring your favorite team, family name, or characters from your favorite movies by looking at Etsy.com.

two-by-fours that are cut to length. If you’re handy with a saw, you can do this at home. If not, ask to have the wood cut at your local lumberyard. Be sure to sand down the edges before stacking the boards to create a classic Jenga tower! For extra fun, pick a few paint colors and paint each board. Visit ABeautifulMess.com/make-this-giant-jenga to see a complete set of instructions.

Buy: Skip the project and buy GoSports Giant Wooden Toppling Tower online, which retails for about $70 and stacks over 5 feet high.

Classic Horseshoes: Intermediate DIY Tossing horseshoes is a great way to pass an afternoon. To play, you’ll just need to set up two sand pits in your yard. Get a handful of horseshoes,

Whether you buy or DIY, remember to have fun and always supervise your children while playing outdoors, especially when it comes to yard games! THE VICTIM CARD

W hat to D o W hen Y our S pouse P lays the V ictim D uring D ivorce

Divorce is messy and tricky, and, at times, it feels impossible. The financial and legal process can leave the strongest people in tatters. And it’s made harder when your spouse plays the “victim card” — that is, they play the victim regardless of the situation and never accept responsibility for their actions. What can you do when this happens? 1. Why does your spouse play the victim? They may do it for myriad reasons — to manipulate others, to escape responsibility, to cope with their life circumstances, or just to get their way. Once you’ve determined the motive for their victim status, it’s easier to come up with an effective response strategy. For example, if they play the victim for attention, consider how you can reduce the amount of attention they might receive for their ploy. 2. Depending on the circumstances, consider empathizing with them. This can be hard, but empathy can go a long way. They can feel heard without your having to tell them they are right. Listen to their opinions and accept them. Once you’ve done

this, you can share your point of view and hope they take responsibility for their actions.

3. Check in on them. They may be acting that way because no one is actively making sure they are okay. This is especially possible during a divorce. Question if they are sleeping, eating what they need to, and doing things that bring them joy. These simple things help us reflect on our own lives and determine what’s bothering us. It really comes down to doing something about it. Don’t let it bother you only to ignore it. Make the efforts to talk to your spouse, empathize with them, and show them you are listening. This could change the way they communicate and provide better outcomes for a divorce. Meanwhile, strategize to make sure your (and your children’s) interests are guarded regardless of how your spouse acts.

For more informative articles like this one, be sure to visit our blog at JustFamilyLaw.com/family-law-expert-blog.

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W ord S earch Adventure Camping

MAKE A SPLASH

Father Gemini Hiking Juneteenth Park Picnic Pride

Sandals Sunburn Swimming

4 S afety R eminders to T ake to the P ool

With the unofficial start of summer coming up on Memorial Day weekend — and with the school year winding down — kids and families will be spending more time at the local pool (those that are open) or in the pool right in their own backyard. But pools aren’t without their dangers. As you and your family take to the water, here are a few quick safety reminders. Supervision is a must. There should be at least one adult in the immediate area to keep an eye on kids at all times. This goes for public and private pools. If there isn’t a lifeguard on duty, it may be up to you to take on the role. Additionally, whether it’s your kids or yourself, never swim alone. It’s always better to have a second person nearby to render assistance if needed. No diving means no diving. Just as you should never run next to a pool, you should never dive into a pool with posted “No Diving” signs — or if you cannot verify the depth of the pool (or any body of water, for that matter). This isn’t to prevent splashing on other pool guests. The sign is there because the water is too shallow to safely dive. The American Red Cross recommends a depth of 9 feet or more in unobstructed water for safe diving conditions. Keep rescue equipment close by. Whether you’re at home, a public pool, or a club pool, always confirm rescue equipment is nearby. It should be in sight and easy to access in an emergency. Most public pools should have safety equipment in sight of all patrons, generally near the lifeguard station. However, if you do not see anything (rescue hooks, ring buoys, float line), ask pool officials. Clarify the location of the safety equipment, and if it’s not in sight, request that it be brought out. Become CPR certified. If you or your kids are frequent swimmers, consider becoming first aid and CPR certified. In general, these are great skills to have, and they can make a difference in many life-threatening situations, including at the pool. They are also great skills for kids to learn. The average CPR class is three hours long and covers a variety of life-saving techniques and topics. Certification is offered through the Red Cross and you can find classes at RedCross.org/take-a-class .

GRILLED CHICKEN SHAWARMA

Inspired by FeastingAtHome.com

INGREDIENTS

• 2 tbsp ground cumin • 2 tbsp ground coriander • 2 tsp kosher salt • 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper • 2 tsp turmeric • 1 tsp ground ginger

• 1 tsp ground black pepper • 2 tsp allspice • 8 garlic cloves, minced • 6 tbsp olive oil • 2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken thighs

DIRECTIONS

1. To create marinade, whisk all spices with the garlic and olive oil in a medium bowl. 2. Add chicken to the bowl, coat well with marinade, cover, and let sit in the fridge for at least 20 minutes — or up to 48 hours. Strain off excess marinade before cooking. 3. Preheat grill to medium-high heat. Grill thighs for 10–12 minutes on each side, or until a meat thermometer reads 165 F. 4. Serve with rice, vegetables, or pita bread with tzatziki.

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Inside

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Keep Kids Entertained During the Summer

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DIY or Buy: Summer Lawn Games When Your Spouse Plays the Victim — How to Respond Take These Tips to the Swimming Pool Grilled Chicken Shawarma

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3 Professional Development Resources That Don’t Suck

IMPROVE YOUR SKILL SET WITH 3 EASY PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT METHODS

A lifelong learner mentality is often lauded as a habit of successful people, but far too many professional development courses are geared toward entrepreneurs, CEOs, and managers. However, you don’t need a leadership title to benefit from this knowledge. Dip your toe into the professional development waters with these three tips for seamlessly incorporating learning into your life. Go to school with the pros. If you could harness the knowledge of world-leading experts, wouldn’t you want to? Platforms like MasterClass, LinkedIn Learning, and Skillshare offer expert knowledge in bite-size courses that users can take at their own pace. Learn how to write from Malcolm Gladwell or Roxanne Gay or master the art of negotiation from FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss. (And for fun, become a chef with Gordon Ramsay!) Commit to one video chapter each week or listen as you do household chores. Just spend a few moments afterward reflecting on the content so it can soak in. Download apps for quick learning. There may be points when you are just too busy or find that starting a new class or habit is difficult. Don’t quit; instead, look at your smartphone.

Download apps like Libby — an app connected to local libraries where users can check out audiobooks or read digitally — to get a quick, easy fix of professional development. You could also try podcasts on Spotify, Stitcher, or Apple Podcasts. There are plenty of short episodes that focus on professional development.

Track your progress. With so many options, classes, and tools

available to you, it can be overwhelming to set, track, and meet your professional development goals. That’s where habit trackers can help! Whether you prefer to use pen and paper for journaling or download an app for digital tracking (try Coach.me or Habitify), a habit tracker allows you to see tangible progress and identify areas of improvement. Bonus Tip: Find a mentor or buddy to do professional development with you! Everything is easier with a friend, and whether you need someone to hold you accountable or are looking for support from someone wiser than you, someone by your side may be just what you need.

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